Home Again..


It’s a funny place!

Seems odd to me that it’s a place I find it hard to write and yet I draw so much inspiration from it.

Maybe it’s all that time I spend just looking out over the landscape or standing atop a hill with my foot in a feature of erosion. I suppose the reason it inspires is as much to do with my familiarity of the place and the sense of… completeness I feel when I’m here. Maybe that’s it, it could explain a lot. In order to write you have to be incomplete.

Once upon a time I read a story in which they put forward that the human mind is a fluid construct, a jigsaw with a piece missing and if you were to insert that piece it would become like a geodesic dome and become very strong but inflexible and send you bonkers! The type of madness being defined by that final strut as it were.

Maybe ‘home’ is my missing piece, although it has to be said that I don’t feel insane when I’m here… although I’ve always assumed that madness is a subjective rather than an objective thing. How can a mad person know they are mad when their own world makes complete sense and if you turn that on its head how can a ‘sane’ person be 100% sure that they’re not mad just because they’re world is ‘normal’. Catch 22? Hmmm…

I should really explain that ‘home’ isn’t where I live most of the time, a small issue that I can see can and is annoying to those that share my house but that is how I feel. Home is where the heart is or at least where there is the least tension on your soul, perhaps?

So the past ten days I’ve been up on a hill enjoying the seasonal weather and I have to say that a fall of frozen water particles does add something, a different something, to a scene that I love and adore. The reason I’m here doesn’t (well not totally) involve monetary considerations so I’m free to enjoy it. Not a total lack of scribbling endeavour but although I like the idea that I’ve scratched I’m really not happy with how the first half has progressed but it is outside my comfort zone what I am trying to achieve and yes I have written some stuff that you may think if ‘that’ is in my comfort zone there is something seriously wrong with me but where’s the fun in not being contradictory?

The piece about to be posted just after this one was written on the journey away from home so maybe I just need to keep travelling back ‘n forth but if the outward journey was anything to go by (almost being ejected from the coach and missing the coach at one point) well, it may give me a lot of reference/inspirational material… who knows maybe a Psychology graduate may feature one day.

So there you have it and on with the show, as they say.


~ by ftfagos on January 22, 2013.

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